TNA: Unboxing A Box Of TRISTAR TNA Impact Wrestling GLORY Trading Cards (Part 2)

I’m baaaaack. Miss me? While I may have gotten more TNA signed cards than I know what to do with in part 1 of this unboxing, I...
Photo by Evan Cross
Photo by Evan Cross
[Miz voice] I’m baaaaack. Miss me?

While I may have gotten more TNA signed cards than I know what to do with in part 1 of this unboxing, I still have more for you. I’m still promised a Slammiversary mat piece or a ring-worn clothing piece. I can’t wait to see them.


  • Chris Sabin – According to the back of this card, Chris Sabin “fulfilled the lifelong dream of every wrestler” when he won the TNA World Heavyweight Champion. Yeah, okay.
  • Garrett Bischoff – His “Moment of Glory” was when he met his wife. Sweet, but that says something about his wrestling career.
  • Austin Aries – If he could have dinner with four people, it would be Jesse Ventura, Bob Uecker, Bill Maher and Jesus. I’d like to be a fly on the wall for that dinner. Definitely not sitting at the table, that’d be awkward.
  • Other cards: Sting, Tito Ortiz, Jeff Hardy drawing


  • Chavo Guerrero Jr. – His “Moment of Glory” is a tie between the first time he wrestled in front of a crowd and the first time he solved a Rubik’s Cube.
  • James Storm – Storm has had 11 tag team championship reigns and has apparently gotten a few more since then. He’s also won one world title, so he’s slightly more accomplished than Billy Gunn.
  • Jeff Hardy drawing – I’m up to nine of these. Will that be enough to make the puzzle I’m not sure exists?
  • Other cards: Dixie Carter, Hernandez, ODB


  • Gunner – The photo makes it look like he just aggressively farted.
  • Jeremy Borash – A terrible driver, according to Bobby Roode. Good to know.
  • Manik autographed card – Faceless people have signatures too!
  • Other cards: Jeff Hardy, Velvet Sky, Hernandez<


  • Magnus – One of his “Health Tips” is to work hard. “People put too much emphasis on genetics,” Magnus said. Scott Steiner would not approve of this card.
  • Bobby Roode – He was “inundated” with congratulations after winning the TNA World Heavyweight Championship. Including from “NHL star Mike Fisher, among others.” Mike Fisher was the most prominent person?
  • Mr. Anderson – I always get him and Karl Anderson mixed up. This is the guy who was in WWE as Mr. Kennedy. He looks totally different with dark hair.
  • Other cards: Jeff Hardy, Miss Tessmacher, AJ Styles



  • Austin Aries – “Austin Aries is a polarizing figure in the ring, period.” He’s also a vegan. PERIOD.
  • Christopher Daniels – His “Health Tip” is to do P90X. Paul Ryan would be proud.
  • Sting – The card says he has “gone on to amazing glory” since joining TNA. That’s a bit strong. I’d go with “noteworthy glory.”
  • Other cards: Bobby Roode, AJ Styles, Jeff Hardy drawing


  • Christy Hemme – “When I think of Christy Hemme, I think of one word: Love.” – Velvet Sky. Good to know.
  • Rob Terry – I’ve never heard of this guy, but he is absolutely jacked. He’s from Wales but lives in Louisville. Must be a culture shock.
  • Rockstar Spud – The modern-day Spike Dudley.
  • Other cards: Chris Sabin, Eric Young, Jeff Hardy drawing


  • Samoa Joe – It’s a shame Samoa Joe never made his way to WWE. One of the best active big man workers.
  • Kazarian – I am completely unable to remember the differences between Kazarian, Konnan and Kurrgan. I know they’re all completely different but I can’t tell you who is who.
  • Jeff Hardy drawing – They’re still coming. At this point I’m just waiting for my Slammiversary 2013 mat piece. Or event-worn clothing card.
  • Other cards: Velvet Sky, Robbie E, Jeff Hardy

Bully Ray


  • Bully Ray event- worn clothing card – And there it is. One of 50 pieces. I’m frankly just glad it’s someone I’ve heard of.
  • Gail Kim – This card talks about her Slammiversary XI match, where Kim and Taryn Terrell fought “for almost 10 minutes.” Must have been thrilling.
  • Other cards: Wes Brisco, Kurt Angle, Jeff Hardy drawing


  • Knux – I watched the 2009 Royal Rumble with some friends a few months ago, and we were all baffled about the performance of Knux (then known as Mike Knox). He lasted more than 32 minutes – longer than The Undertaker, Kane, CM Punk and Big Show. By the time he was eliminated, we had forgotten his name and christened him “Mike Snow.”
  • Chavo Guerrero Jr. – He is a Dallas Cowboys fan. At least he’s billed from Texas.
  • Hulk Hogan – “Us blondes have to stick together,” Velvet Sky on Hulk Hogan. They’re both only half-blonde, though. Half of Velvet Sky’s head has brown hair. Half of Hulk Hogan’s head has no hair.
  • Other cards: Jeff Hardy, Jessie Godderz, Dixie Carter


  • Hector Guerrero – The Gobbledy Gooker! I hate that a Guerrero had to do that. Actually, I hate that anyone had to do that.
  • Jeff Hardy – His “Health Tip” is … wait, why would I take health advice from Jeff Hardy?
  • Mickie James, ODB, and Miss Techmacher autographed card – Man, I hit the Mickie James jackpot, didn’t I?
  • Other cards: Hulk Hogan, Velvet Sky, Sam Shaw

Mickie James ODB Miss Tessmacher staff writer Evan Cross can be reached at . Follow him on Twitter at .

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