Corrigan’s Corner: Who Is Miss WrestleMania?

We all know that Shawn Michaels is Mr. WrestleMania, a reputation earned for delivering show-stealing matches and indelible moments year after year on the Grandest Stage.

But who is Miss WrestleMania?

In the age of Ronda Rousey and the U.S. Women’s National Soccer Team and of course, the NXT Four Horsewomen, a woman deserves to be crowned with the same distinction as the Heartbreak Kid, and not the farce WWE put on at WrestleMania XXV when Santino Marella (in drag) won a battle royal for the moniker.

The challenge is that women haven’t been positioned as equal to men at WrestleMania. There is usually one women’s match per card, and that tradition only began at WrestleMania XIV. In other aspects, the ladies either accompany their man to ringside or appear in backstage skits.

Perhaps that will change in years to come (Bayley vs. Sasha Banks will surely main event one day), but as of now, we have 31 years to analyze in the hopes of determining the one woman who left her mark on the Showcase of the Immortals.

Disqualified:

Tori, Ivory, the Bellas, Lelani Kai, and Eve have all lost their matches. Even though Eve made a WrestleMania moment by kicking her whipped bae Zach Ryder in the broskies, that did more harm to his career than it helped hers.

Jazz, Victoria, and Luna have each batted .500 in their WrestleMania histories.

Marlena and Sunny both managed their respective charges, but neither created any special moments. But Marlena does have a win as Terri in shitshow against Miss Kitty at WrestleMania 2000.

Linda McMahon, yes I’m including her, played a role in the main event storyline of that same WrestleMania, but her charge Mick Foley didn’t win. The next year she took a page out of Eve’s book by blasting her husband in his grapefruits in one of the biggest pops you’ll ever hear.

Vickie Guerrero has a perfect Mania record, but it includes only one win in a 10-women tag team match.

Beth Phoenix was featured in three matches, winning only won, and lacking any true moments.

And to shock you, Lita has made four WrestleMania appearances: interfering in the TLC at X-7, losing a triple threat at X-8, lighting a table on fire at 22, and coaching Christy Hemme to a loss at 21.

Thus, the Hall of Famer is disqualified from Miss WrestleMania contention.

Honorable Mention:

Madusa won her only WrestleMania match at the 10^th anniversary, retaining the Women’s Championship against Lelani Kai. She later appeared onstage last year during the Hall of Fame segment.

Melina retained the Women’s Championship at WrestleMania 23 against Ashley and won a tag team bout with Beth at 24. But neither of those matches stand the test of time.

It’s still too early to anoint Paige, but she did team with AJ in victorious fashion at her Mania debut last year.

Top 10

10. Sable

The goddess of the Attitude Era teamed with then-husband Marc Mero to defeat the bizarre pairing of Goldust and Luna at WrestleMania XIV. One year later, Sable graced the cover of Playboy, one of its highest selling issues, and became a primadonna in WWE. As her fame soared, she attracted deep admirers such as Tori, who she brushed away until the mysterious blonde demanded a title shot against her former girl crush. Sable successfully defended her Women’s Championship against Tori at WrestleMania XV with the help of the herculean Nicole Bass.

9. Wendi Richter

Hard to believe, but women were an integral part to the success of the first WrestleMania. In the summer of 1984, pop sensation Cyndi Lauper began a verbal feud with Capt. Lou Albano regarding his role in the “Girls Just Want to Have Fun” video. To settle the disagreement, Lauper chose Wendi Richter and Albano chose the Women’s Champion Fabulous Moolah. It was the first live match on cable TV, as part of The Brawl to End It All on MTV.

Lauper cracked Moolah with her purse, leading to Richter’s victory and capture of the title, which Moolah had held for almost 30 years. Obviously pissed, the Fabulous One recruited Lelani Kai to steal the gold from Richter, which she did at The War to Settle the Score in February of 1985.

One month later, with Lauper at her side, Richter won back the Women’s Championship at WrestleMania I. The Rock N’ Wrestling Connection breathed new life into wrasslin’, propelling the carnie sport into pop culture and the mainstream conscience.

8. Chyna

The Ninth Wonder of the World transcended women’s wrestling, becoming one of the boys and winning titles reserved for male competitors. Although her physique has been imitated, no one since has been able to blur the gender lines of WWE. At the peak of her popularity, she reunited with D-X patriarch Triple H at WrestleMania XV, teamed with Too Cool to defeat the Radicalz at WrestleMania 2000, and then won the Women’s Championship from Ivory in a one-woman massacre at WrestleMania X-7.

7. Stephanie McMahon

It’s only fitting that Steph comes right after Chyna, seeing as how she pretty much caused Triple H’s ex to flee the company once The Game had become smitten with the Billionaire Princess. Despite never competing at WrestleMania, the McMahon heiress has had her fingernails dug deep into its history.

She accompanied HHH in his revolutionary win at 2000, the first villains to walk out of a WrestleMania main event victorious. (She got Rock Bottomed to end the show, though.) Then she accompanied her father in his street fight against her brother Shane at X-7, only to be attacked by arch rival Trish Stratus. She accompanied former nemesis Chris Jericho in his Undisputed Championship match against Triple H at 18, pretty much overshadowing the champ’s presence and turning it into Trips vs. Steph.

In the buildup to WrestleMania XXV, Randy Orton DDT’ed her and forced himself on her, enraging her husband and his opponent. At Mania XXX, she did everything in her power to prevent Daniel Bryan from eventually winning the WWE World Heavyweight Championship, perhaps her best work ever. And last year, she provoked The Rock, who recruited Ronda Rousey in what seemed to be setting up a dream match.

6. Sherri

The Sensational One paved the way for Chyna, Sable and all other women who refuse to be just a pretty face at ringside. Sherri had numerous WrestleMania appearances, managing Shawn Michaels to victory at WrestleMania VIII and then accompanying Tatanka in his countout win over HBK the next year.

What bumps her up in this list is that she actually competed on the Grandest Stage, teaming with the “Macho King” in a losing effort against Dusty Rhodes and that sweet Sapphire lost at WrestleMania VI, and then attacking Savage after he lost his retirement match at Mania VII. Sherri’s assault led to one of the greatest WrestleMania and pro wrestling moments of all time.

5. Mickie James

She’s on here for not one match, but one moment. You can’t find it on the DVD or the Network. Hell, it’s tough to find on Youtube. But if you saw WrestleMania 22 live, you know exactly what I’m talking about.

During her battle with Trish Stratus, Mickie countered Stratusfaction by gripping Trish’s crotch. She then pulled away, walked toward the hard camera, and licked between her fingers, causing the WORLD to explode.

It was the perfect kind of storytelling that Shawn Michaels perfected. Whereas HBK was sorry that he was about to retire his childhood hero Ric Flair, Mickie was a lesbo stalker obsessed with tasting every ounce of the woman who rejected her.

I love you, Mickie James.

4. Molly Holly

The perennial Women’s Champion was so determined to get on the WrestleMania XX card that she volunteered to shave her head if she lost. Well, she lost and went bald.

Molly Holly is hardfuckingcore.

She’s a pioneer for women’s wrestling, a decade before the Divas’ Revolution.

3. AJ Lee

She wasn’t with WWE long, but Mrs. CM Punk certainly made an impact. She retained her Divas’ Championship in a 14-woman invitational at WrestleMania XXX, asserting her dominance over the Total Divas’ cast. Last year, she teamed with Paige, the gal who beat her for the title the night after XXX, in a victorious sendoff over the Bellas.

And her deadly kiss with Daniel Bryan at WrestleMania 28 led to the 18 second loss and subsequent “YES!” chants bellowing throughout the world.

2. Trish Stratus

The greatest woman wrestler of all time became a staple of the championship picture at WrestleMania. Her first match was a triple threat in her hometown of Toronto at X-8 where she suffered a crushing defeat to Jazz.

The yoga diva avenged her loss, however, the next year winning the Women’s Title from Victoria in a triple threat also featuring Jazz. At WrestleMania 21, she destroyed Playboy flavor of the year Christy Hemme and then lost the title to Mickie James in a classic battle at Mania 22.

During a break from the championship scene, Trish betrayed Chris Jericho at XX, costing him his match against Christian and then forcing him to watch the Canadians play a lil tonsil hockey.

Before she learned the ropes, Stratus guided Test & Albert to a victory at 2000, and beat the shit out of Steph at X-7.

The Hall of Famer returned to the ring at WrestleMania 26, teaming with John Morrison and SNOOKI to beat Dolph Ziggler and LayCool.

1. Miss Elizabeth

Although she never wrestled, Miss Elizabeth was the centerpiece behind many a WrestleMania during the Hulkamania Era. Heading into the second edition, she was the object of George Steele’s affection, prompting her jealous “Macho Man” to battle “The Animal” for the Intercontinental Championship.

One year later, she accompanied Randy Savage as he defended the gold against Ricky Steamboat, in one of the greatest matches ever. Steele emerged again, hoping to nuzzle up with Liz, but ending up knocking Savage off the turnbuckle and leading to a victory for The Dragon.

At WrestleMania IV, she valeted for Macho as he rose through the ranks of the WWF Championship tournament, eventually winning the belt. Ever the classy beaut, the “First Lady of Wrestling” changed outfits four times that evening, looking more spectacular with each one.

She was the direct result of the massive buy rate for WrestleMania V as the Mega Powers exploded due to the Hulkster’s lustful eyes.

And then at WrestleMania VII, as tears flowed from the thousands in attendance and millions watching at home, Elizabeth reunited with Savage in pro wrestling’s ultimate love story.

Wait, pro wrestling’s “love story?” Doesn’t that need a lil Flair? WOOO! Heading into WrestleMania VIII, Slick Ric claimed that Liz was “mine before she was yours,” and vowed to show some titillating photos as a celebration over his win against Savage.

Unfortunately for us, Macho rolled Naitch up to win his second and final WWE Championship.

As the foundation behind many successful storylines, the late, great Miss Elizabeth has now been crowned Miss WrestleMania.